sniper lines

you feel the chill on the air,
moonlight shining in your hair,
watch for the muzzle flair.
did you see it? hah, you didn't see shit.
because I'm the nightmare from afar,
i know exactly where you are.

cold steel snug in shoulder with sight set
compensating
wind and distance
target marked
it's you baby

did you see it? heh, you didn't see shit
before you knew it you were hit
sniper round
right through your face
between us almost a mile of space
you just won the human race
but i'll be the one

who goes home for supper

running dry

the water is not so deep anymore,
tasting sediment when i drink.
grating against teeth every grain irritates

i'm running dry
this river become a stream
in the base of the valley
the valley of dreams
the valley for the fallen
damning up the flow
with sins and bodies
taking blow by blow
unrelenting currents
pushing out
pushing out

and i taste sediment
every grain
irritates my tongue
i spit

it doesnt help

short lines from my facebook status.

dreaming of post-apocalyptica raining down ash.
black snow falls covering everything
in the wasted dandruff of gods.
everything broken and falling apart,
this is the chance we have to restart.
so hold me tight through the night
without you i'll fall apart.

Response poems would be cool... this is like... the beginning of a creepy ass duet peice

terror's taste tantalizes my tongue
so run darling, run
because no matter where you go
i'll know
i can smell it
i can taste it
salty sweat sliding down slick skin
the smell of days old hair
greasy, unkempt
filled with dirt and grime
evidence of my crime

and i haven't even started yet

first you ran to the city
driving fast in an old car
not knowing i was behind
shadow in the night
constantly causing fright
you stopped for gas
found tires slashed
you ran for cover
alleyways
subway stations
i was there with you
always out of sight
just slightly out of reach

you slept on the train
you slept in dumpsters
you hid and wanted help
but it was too late for that
hah
covered in grime
eyes wide
looking more mad than haunted
meanwhile i flaunted
freedom
control
power
making you live how i deemed fit
because from where i sit
i'm in control
and you're just a scared little girl

now we sit here
sitting across the same table
in a sealed room
one gun between us

one gun
the equal sign for our equation
giving us a solution
but who will use it
who will put an end to the game

i must say i'm getting bored of it
but i'd really enjoy
to hear what you have to say.

Fuck shit up rap?

[Chorus]
The world's become a preteen boy,
who never got to use his toy
emo and crying
not even trying
to solve any issues
just grabbing more tissues
to wipe it all away
but hey (hey, hey)
that's OK
i know hot to fix it
drink from this cup
and
[end chorus]

Lets fuck shit up
i think it's far too nice here
and step-ford neighborhoods are spreading too near
i want broken glass
i want fires on your ass
Revolution coming to slow
gotta speed it up with my flow
don't you think it's time i got in
spitting out rhymes letting beats spin
i mean I've seen the shit on MTV
fills my eyes till i cant see
anything but what's in front of me
nightmares of the ego
butting heads with the lowest of the low
it's making my heart sick
making my timer tick tick tick
cause i'm about to explode
blast you from down the road
leave nothing but the dust
leave you in the rain to rust
crushed underneath my feet
i'll be the last person you ever meet

[chorus]


lets fuck shit up
because your life is too calm
i got a grenade in my palm
ready to toss into the church
get ready cause it's for me their gonna search
from on high and below they're gonna know
no one else in any world runs my show
circus master with a whip
making tigers hide and dancers trip
you're all just clowns
painted smiles hiding frowns
when i say jump ask how high
make you jump till you reach the sky
pull out the ground from under you
make you fall right through
straight to hell so you have stories to tell
never know when you're doing well
i keep life an interesting game
never letting any day be the same

[Chorus]


lets fuck shit up
running from the cops like it's my job
anything i don't got i'll just rob
from the stupid rich, the filthy elite
i'll just crush'm underneath my feet
Lets fuck shit up
let's drink from the same cup
taste destruction on your lips
feel life flow through your hips
you bump and grind through terror's toll
now that we're through it's time to roll
out of the club that you all came too
it's about time i said
we're through.

[Chorus]

Cause
The world's become a preteen boy,
who never got to use his toy
emo and crying
not even trying
to solve any issues
just grabbing more tissues
to wipe it all away
but hey (hey, hey)
that's OK
i know hot to fix it
drink from this cup
and fuck shit up
and fuck shit up

Just fuck shit up
till the world burns down

how i would've ended quarentine

(after girl is grabbed into darkness)

News Anchor:

November First 2015, within the city of LA
Marked the beginning of what appeared to be
some new kind of disease.
acting as a fast acting rabies
traveling from animal to animal
animal to human
and yes
human to human
After a failed government cover-up
a tape was rescued describing and visualizing the worst fears
of every childhood nightmare being brought to life at once.
Regular people, Criminals, Police Officers, Firemen, Parents
even children
going mad and attacking each other with no control over themselves

since then

there has been over 300 recorded incidences
and over 2000 casualties in america alone
proving the need for a martial law to be placed
until a cure can be found.

the public is being ordered
not suggested
not implied
we cannot stress this enough
the public is being ordered
to remain in their homes
until military transport
comes to provide access to supplies
and travel to places of work.
anyone found outside
will be shot on sight.

to show you what happens to those in this experience
comes a portion of a tape found at the third incident of the disease in Kansas City. the cameraman was working the night on Cops when he caught this... final moment:

(Panicked Fireman:)
Shit
shit shit shit
shitshitshitshit
did you fucking see that?
what the fuck was that?
she was fine a second ago
just a bit groggy
she's old
old people are like that...

no
no no no
nonononononono
OLD PEOPLE
DO NOT
RIP OUT THROATS
they dont do it
not little old ladies
that's like...
rottweilers...
or fucking psychos
not little old ladies

the call said she had been screaming
we came in... she was asleep in a chair
just sitting there
she didn't respond to our calls

we picked her up and carried her downstairs
but halfway there
she freaked out
i don't know what happened to the other guy
he was some kind of cop
all i know was she got him
and

oh god the blood
it was everywhere
all over me
i just...
i cant stop tasting it
it covered me completely

i just don't know what to do
no one gives a shit that we're trapped in here
they locked us in!

we're all going to die aren't we?
*see little girl zombie behind him, cameraman stutters*

oh fu- *screams and attacks. cameraman runs away panting then camera gets thrown. only screams are heard, then the girl appears as a zombie in the camera screaming till sudden blackout*

burn the royals

have you ever looked deep into burned flesh
the skin
bubbled over and pussing
yellow
with purple splotches
then red surrounds?
these are the colors of royalty

yellow for their coin
shining and true
it holds the power
pussing out
falling off
dripping onto the world

purple for the rarity
of regality
these spots
cauterized
protected
saintly

the red is the blood
spilled by the masses
it burns
it hurts
nerve endings still alive
screaming out
"Please
end our suffering
please
make it stop"

but like burns
this cycle doesn't stop
the pain fades
but does it ever really
go away?
the scars left
by creating a new world
are always left
to remind you.

burning

I shall not dream of you tonight.
we've been at this game for too long now and i fear it is coming to an end.
it was a good run but now i think the time has come for me to sleep alone.
gripping tight the sheets as the pain of missing you takes hold
i fall deeper into self-loathing until my knuckles turn white.
until your memory fades

it hurts more than i can bear
but i must
like atlas and the world
it all rests on my shoulders
keeping me from stretching my legs
keeping me from overthrowing tyrants
like you...

holding my heart tight
grip of iron
it burns
it burns
such purity

i am mythical beast
i am elf in the woods
elusive but drawn to you
moth to flame
it burns
it burns

so i grip tight the sheets
until i forget
and the pain
is but a memory

this needs expanding at some point

i always wanted to play the villain.
now i cant stop myself.
you're just a child's fable character
and i'm the nightmare
that haunts a child's dreams

so run run run fast as you can.
it doesn't matter
you're no gingerbread man.
over the river, through the wood
grandmother's house you go
running away from the big bad wolf
but you're trapped in my little show

i'm a scorpion,
you the frog.
this is all my nature.
to sting,
to chase,
to kill,
to die.
come over here and say
goodbye.

because that's the only way this story will end
lessons learned and feelings to mend
one will loose
and one will win
till the tale starts over again

nuclear war whoooooo!

dreaming through raindrops as they
drip drop fall upon this wasteland of industry.
post-apocalyptic future come to me
because i'm sick of all this complacency.

i want wasteland and radiation
i want excitement and adventure
true survival of the fittest

where you grimy types
must get grimier
to leech off of whatever society grows

you hippie types
gotta do whatever you have to
knowing it is probably against your morals

and where people like me
can do what i can
when i can
helping others
as much as possible
but knowing that for my own survival
and those i care about
you're ass is grass.

dreaming of sea salt seraphim,
the only light showing on the shore.
phosphorus,
for they are the only ones
who can guide you through this isolation,
this fog

sea salt seraphim
singing in fog
you hear them
before you see them
guiding lights
with voices
so holy

so holy
singing praises
for all that is good
it burns the ears
like the light burns our eyes
when we are so close
to heaven

le sigh

face book horoscope:

You're playing games with someone's mind -- or heart, if you're feeling somewhat evil. You feel so great that you know you're not doing any real harm, so go for it and see what comes next


...

great

lady sleep

i've had my ear nibbled by lady sleep.
sandman has left her to her own devices yet again and she comes for me.
she's cool to the touch,
comforting,
her taste is like fresh water after miles of travel in the sand.
she grabs my hand,
i can barely stand.
so i go now to lay next to her and dream.
dream until i rip out from the seams and can be born into what I've always wanted to be.
a better me.

lady sleep had hands that roam
purifying every inch of me
bringing me closer to true dreaming
bringing me closer to her
with lips like rain
they kiss my desert mouth
we make mud
beautiful mud
it slides
slides the pain away
because it cant root in mud

i have no vegetation
to keep the desert still

villian to hero

I hunted for your darling.
knowing that you couldn't protect her is killing you inside
but you knew there was no where you could hide.
I'm the forest that you'll get lost within.
I'm the cliff in the night you never saw coming.
fall down into my jaws so i can taste your flesh.
your suffering is so special to me.
you see nothing tastes as sweet
as heroes fallen into madness or villains reforming their ways.
the public, they see both
and neither is true.
but I will be the hero
and you, pure madness

hahahaha
smoke and mirrors my friend.
it's all smoke and mirrors.
oh except your darling, she's just...
hanging around

really she was just in the way
our relationship is so much...

more

so much more important
she was really just holding you back
you just need to be pushed over that edge
i think you have been now.

yes.

looking into your eyes
so high and mighty
clinging to, virtue
what you thought was golden and true
but in the end it didn't save her did it?
in the end, you failed.

it wont save anyone else either.
that's right
I'm not done
I'll eradicate all those you love
all those you come close to
and every time
every single time
I'll make it look like you did it
or worse, that you made them
do it to themselves.

and they'll believe me.

doesn't that just kill you?
these people
you save them time and time again
put your life on the line
but when it comes time for their trust in you
to finally be tested
they jump on you
like flies on shit

hahaha
I'll be a hit
bigger than you
in so many ways
better too
how hard can it be
to be better than you?

heroes...
they think they can save everyone
they believe their own press
but really
you need to be put in your place
every now and again.

soon, I'll be your only friend.
and you'll see what you knew all along
you and i
are the only ones who matter
everyone else is just
a distraction.

unrequited love

alas the world of unrequited love,
be it a harsh war-torn wasteland.
they say all is fair in love and war,
but in the end we're all deemed
"collateral damage"

just in the background
getting broken by bombs
and gunfire
rattatat
like rain on the roof
bullets fly into the walls of our hearts

we'll get rebuilt someday
long from now
and look back
with scars covered up
plaster and putty

because in the end
we're all covered up
plaster and putty
paint a pretty picture
with your bare hands

you might as well
it's all your fault

i need my blanket

I have never been comfortable sleeping without cover.
when you held me down it was comforting,
but you never let me go.
when the morning came you held me down
as i wriggled you giggled and then you'd drown,
drown me in your sweet sin.
tempting me with your skin,
goddamn woman, let me go.
you're smothering me with your pillow.
i've never been comfortable sleeping without cover,
but this is too much.

melting

i haven't found myself hungering like this since you tore out my heart.
i need to fill in this hole.
now i hunt,
i search,
in ancient woods to modern metropolis.
i hunt
i search
until i can fill these holes you left inside my body.
the size of your tiny hands ripping at me,
piece by piece.

i have chunks missing in my ice-sculpture body
you've taken and turned me into art
but i'm melting
and these chunks
let the heat work so much faster

so i need to hunt
i need to search
fill these holes with snow
keep myself cool
so i don't just melt away

more bed/women lines... god

i seem to have a pillow that's warm on both sides lately.
i think this is because wherever you rest your head,
our hearts connect so strong that you lie on the reflection of my bed.
mirror mirror on my wall,
when will it be my time to fall,
through the mattress into her arms?

horror poem

this is the moonlit chase
this is the witching hour
frighteningly wonderful
it begins as a friendly chase
till the first girl falls
you think you can hide
my momentary distraction
but this girl is just skin and bones
i need meat
i need you

the red hair sets me off
like the Spanish bull
you're no matador
so i wont just rush in
change this game to cat and mouse
i know... i know that I'll win.

stalking through corridors,
shotgun slung snug into my shoulder,
i know you're hiding my little red riding hood.

this big bad wolf is gonna huff *shlick*,
puff *shlack*,
and blow *BOOM*
you're world away.

howl up at the moon
drink up blood
beautiful red as your hair
the taste of iron sits on my tongue

have you ever noticed
gorgeous sounds like it begins
with gore?
i take this idea to it's finest
since you had to stop running
buckshot in your leg
it will only hurt for a moment

breathe in
breathe out
exhale so the shot
fires straight and true
oh the taste
so many holes
to drink from
to watch the droplets
drip
drop
trickle down your skin
heavenly sin
breath in
huff *shlick*
breath out
puff *shlack*
and blow you away
*BOOM*

skin that screams "do not touch this man"
heart quietly whispers "we want something real and long term"
brain talks of responsibility and ethics,
cock just says again and again "get in here"

such conflict
nothing agrees
skin gets angry
inflamed
adding to its point

the heart desperately yearns to be heard
but the brain just talks it down
ethics and responsibility
bad timing
not right
just gonna hurt
her and i

we ignore the cock
we know what it wants
we got it the first time
it isn't very smart.

but really
what peckerhead is?

A story of love wanted, love never gained.

6th grade
a young boy stares at a girl
who unknowingly holds his heart

Catie, you make my life
cliché like a classic
play on words
about love

6th grade
a young boy
experiences his first “date”
they made noodles by hand
in the girl's kitchen

Catie, You have always been there
out of reach, in my eyes
placed in my thoughts
I tried to escape
I failed

6th grade
a young boy
knows her phone number
before learning his own
he doesn't call it that often
but he knows the number by heart

Catie, you may have
ruined my relationships
it wasn't fair
that they had to share my heart
with you
but I couldn't help it

9th grade
a young boy is moving away
he has a girlfriend
but all he cares about
is seeing the girl again
before he goes

Catie, when I take you in my arms
be it greeting, or goodbye
my heart stretches
arms grown for you
to embrace your soul
10th grade
this time the girl is leaving
off to golden sands
the boy says “Stay away from those
Egypt boys.”
he means “Miss me as much as I miss you”

Catie, while you were gone
I wondered every day
how you were doing...
I told no one
until now.

11th grade
a boy broke a glass
in disbelief
throwing it at a wall
“engaged”?
It couldn't be true

Catie, you had the best prank
I saw through it
but just because of the tiny
tiny tiny tiny tiny
chance it might be true
I broke a glass...
over you

Summer
The last moments of boyhood
the young boy
works for the girl
spends as much time as he can
near or with her

Catie, the summer
I spent mostly with you
because I wasn't interested
in any other girl.

Summer
the boy realizes
time is short for them
so he takes the girl
In his arms every chance he gets
and presses his lips onto hers
kissing angels, would feel below it now
Catie...
time is fleeting
and soon we'll be fleeing
to such different futures
will we look back at fools
falling in folly
or will we look back
and smile at the goodness?

Senior year
the boy cannot escape
the constant reminders
of his feelings
he tries to fill the hole
with another relationship
he fails

Catie...
there are things I've wanted to tell you
for years and years
and I never did
because I was afraid
this poem tells it out

Senior year
the boy thinks about her
more and more
knowing he is running out
of time

Catie...
I needed you to know this
before time was up
but I didn't know how to say it
or even bring it
into conversation

senior year
he asks her to prom
no one could be the better choice
she's out of his league
and he knows it

Catie...
prom will be amazing,
and I am so happy
that I get to go with you
because I would only be thinking
about you, looking into my date's eyes

Senior year
graduation is fast upon us
then we will both be leaving
onwards to the future
onwards to our new lives

Catie
are you ready?
Are you sure?
I have faith in you
even if you don't

Summer,
a boy will go off
to train for war
the girl, will go off
and learn in school

Catie,
we never really talk
about our feelings
because I know
I am afraid of them

6th grade
a young boy
stares at a girl
who unknowingly holds his heart
he never really got it back
he doesn't want it anymore
it belongs to her.

Catie, my heart belongs to you
so either take it and hold onto it
or give it back
I don't need a commitment
or you to feel the same
I just need you
to know

Now that you do...
We can move on from here
Kiss me...
with you around
the rest of the world
Is lost to me
Catie...

The rest of the world is lost
you do not want it
so my heart is beating
tha-thump
tha-thump
catie...

things have shattered slightly
things have changed
you don't think I have
its funny that way

you just want to remain friends
you dont want me
to be like I was
back in 6th grade
heartbroken
catie...

i'm stronger than you thought
and I move on quickly
I don't have time to
wait around being miserable over you

I stopped giving a shit
you don't understand
you kept me waiting
when I built up the courage
I stopped caring
catie...

I don't think you realize
i'm a different person
this poem
was supposed to describe
that fact
catie...

fuck it
I dont care
there are things
I didnt notice before
I just wish
we never kissed
catie...

I think now
it's not me
but you
who lost out.

Catie...
goodbye.

hot hot hot

i am melting like faces covered in napalm.
the heat can only be described as hot as when
you walk into my room with lips painted red
whispering "come here"
except i know that i'm sweating alone
feeling disgustingly filthy
from my head to my toes.
that's the way life goes.
i'm just melting away
and this time,
no one is around to drink me up.
wasteful.

we are so wasteful
we throw around color on canvas
copying the world
except we forget
how beautiful it was
when the world was black and white
many shades of grey
but you still knew
how red those lips were
how hot those lips were

how hot you were
when the napalm hit your face
hidden in her kiss
in a time where she would drink you
till nothing was left
but drips in the glass

i drank all my water
yet i am still dry
these burned lips
haven't tasted the same
since they kissed you.

before bed

i see pictures of you now and feel all the time wasted.
What was i thinking shooting for the stars
when there were comets and suns willing to accept me close at hand?
you never did understand.
we would have been trainwreck fantastic.
no one would have been able to look away
as every single car crashed over and over again,
but we never even got on the tracks.
i just shot for the stars and missed by miles
by lightyears
you said you wanted nothing more
than to remain friends.
you scrutinized me
for shortcomings
and made awkwardness
where i made none
because you thought i hadnt changed
you didnt realize
i traveled time
not distance to reach you.
i never knew how to tell how long a mile was
but i can tell the time by the minuet
and you i waited for years
years of light travelling
just to touch your face.

it was wonderful
it was intoxicating
addicting
and then you tore it out from under me
making it empty
meaningless

you broke me sideways
not a derailment
just impact
inwards
crush crush crush
like my head against the wall

you have some of my best love poems...
what will you do
when the world sees them?
and my feelings you rejected
come into light.

what will you do
when the world sees how i shot for the stars
just to watch them say no?

i hope you smile and say
"that's the way it had to go"
because anything else
would make it hurt.

dont tell me you had second thoughts
or things would have been different
if they had been different
because that is crap
i dont care.

you said no
i moved on
now i worry
about how you feel
because i'm not cold yet
but the poems are good
they were meant to be shared
and i'll share them...

i'm sorry.

poor bed... poor bed.

i have a bed that is going to waste.
why did you ever leave my dear?
you know it had grown attached.
there's still an imprint from where you used to lay.
i don't know what to say.
i tried to flip it over,
but there it is...
the spot where you belong.
i hope wherever you are now,
you've got that kind of comfort.
because my bed is tearing up
the arm rests are cold and hard
bottling up emotions
because it cant wrap around you
support you when you're hurt
feel your love
and protect you as you sleep.

my bed is going to waste
because without you in it
why bother sleeping there?

end of the world as we know it

when the world ends my dear,
we will stand atop the ashes and cry out

"Poor children, lost in your searches for escape.
you have found it at last.
Is it all you have dreamed about
is it all you hoped for?
this afterlife you call home now
may you rest in peice
as we breath in your pieces"

creating tornadoes of black.
it tastes like aftermath of attack
bombs dropping
the world burned alive
we watched it burn
we fanned the flames
it was beautiful
the fires licked our lips
in a tender kiss
lovers lies whispering in ears
crackles and burns
we lay in ash
rolling around
kissing death hard on the lips
then left her wanting more
oh how her mouth watered
oh how we poured out
washing clean all the dirt
washing clean the souls
may they rest in piece
we breath in their pieces
what they've left behind
to nourish us

our mouths are dry
come and kiss me again
because the world has ended
we are all we have left.

space travellers

we've fallen out of the sky through the depths of space
passing planets and comets
space dust
we breathe pure passion and solar energy
we're green with envy
because no one else can get this close to heaven
and it's unfair

you just seem to be getting bored of me
facing the starry scenes on the other side
do you want to experience something else?
do you want me anymore?
we've been alone so long
perhaps we need some company

perhaps we need to move on from this place
because one can only touch
all the constillations once
one can only see
so much of infinity
before it all becomes the same
bright stars
little planets
ice
rock
dust
decay
life in rarity
too far to touch
too close for comfort
it would just disrupt our balance
shake us loose from our bonds
but maybe that's what we need
to keep our excitement alive

i think you and i should go down into that black hole,
because i'm sick of seeing stars.
it's pulling us in and we keep fighting,
lets just give in and fall deep,
deep into the well of gravity,
and find out what's on the other side.
because darlin' i fell for you once,
i'd do it again for the sake of adventure.

my character evaluation

a mind full of thoughts i'd rather not share.
why is my character so stereotypical?
predictability and presumptions...
i am obvious...
i am brutish...
i am the one you think i am and i am sorry...
sorry for thinking what i'm thinking
because
i know how bad it is.

i am sex-craved masculinity
with womanizing tendencies
who looks the part of a gentleman
yet pervs it up like Satan

i'll be the best thing you ever had
and keep all your secrets close
then rip myself out of your life
leaving nothing but a ghost

and you'll thank me
you'll wish me well
you'll get jealous as hell
when i move on to someone else.

thanks to the matches for this one... oh and some girl...

"maybe I'll forget what Katie said?
you've got standards, girl,
what the hell are you doing with me?
Yeah, what the hell are you doing with me?
what's a decent girl doing with me?" - the matches "what katie said"

because by all means
i don't deserve decency
disgusting discussions with myself
lead to the likelihood of lustful intentions
darling, what are you thinking
this is a bear trap
i have a reputation
and you're walking right in
soon my jaws will
close around you
close in on you
pricking your skin
unhooking your morals
hand on the thigh
this is how i get high
the adrenaline
of risk
of pushing limits
overcoming them
seeing how far it goes
it's almost like a formula
there's stages
it makes me sick
how easy this is becoming
it makes me sick
that you walked into this
and i fell for myself
every time...

why can't i forget what catie said?
why can't i seem to believe that was the reasoning?
why can't i ask for answers?

will i ever deserve
decency?
or am i just the dark woods
that eats up young girls
with bear traps
digging into skin
getting into your bones
trapping you
within my embrace

sick of hunting, let me be the prey

thinks it's high time someone came into my life
and held themselves in place because that is where they want to be.
i'm sick of searching. come find me.

i am the deer licking salt
easy prey
constantly put out in the open
like teenage girl's cleavage
like prepubescent boy's dirt-stache
i'm innocent
but you want to fire anyway
whether it be for food
to sustain you through cold months
something to warm your belly
and cover you in the dark night
or for sport
to place a trophy on your mantle
something to tell tall tales about to friends
it doesnt matter

if you want me
i'm standing in the open
i'll never see it coming
and if i did
i'd be a deer in the headlights
and let you hit me

full
force

lips tasting like radiator grills
breathing heaving exhaust and pavement
guts ripping open so your tires
can run over my heart
leaving marks
like the bullet
ripping through flesh
exploding blood and gore
on the surroundings
in a modern art painting
of fatal romance

come find me
i'll be licking salt

landscaper thought

the days have been dreary
now they are clear
my dear
i always thought that cleared skies would lead to better days,
but water purifies,
so how can days without water to wash the world clean be considered the good weathered days?
there is one reason,

you.

darling just open wide your pores,
drink in the sunlight,
you're the flower in a garden full of weeds
i will be the landscaper
to change the world around you
renew your soil
surround you with beauty
that comes close
but never quite equals
what you show
with vibrant colors
blossoming through the snow

attempt

touch me there
tick tick
click click
tip-tap-tap
tappity-tap
you push your soul into me
you push your soul into me
and i cry out
every single touch from your fingertip
sends me spinning off into the sun
whirling at light speed
towards the center of the universe
where all the information is held
boxed
contained
kept cool
because god knows it needs to be
you make me way too hot for that.

ocean and shore

you are the beach on which waves fear
because your sandbar washes away year after year
showing the rocky underside
your jagged edges

it wonders
whether it could take you inside it's cool embrace
only to discover you slip away inside
until all that is left
is rocks to be broken upon

i am an ocean tide
moving with a purpose
trying to bring you inside
because i have nothing to hide
these clear waters let you see wonder
all the way down to the dark mystery
that i keep for those who I've swallowed long before
and you...
you scare me
but i cannot stop my course
to break upon your shore.

i wish for gloomy skies of gray
to let me sleep through the day
till all thoughts of you fade away.
it hurts to much to handle
cause all we cause is scandal.
babe... just don't do those things you do to me,
see,
your sand in my eye scrapes my vision
every time you make me open them
and see you.

every time i open my eyes
it scrapes so i can
see your jagged shore
and break

nightmares and heartbreak

fought through nightmares just to stare you in the face one more time...
and you turn me away?
darling cant you see,
there's nothing i want more than you.
darling why cant you see,
you belong with me?
can this be?

if so i travel back into the realm of dreams,
where nightmares await me with open arms.
hold me tight for i fear of breaking.

now with nightmares to comfort me
i grasp onto the pseudo reality
that fear
is an emotion i can overcome
much faster than heartbreak
which sounds like a thousand screams
caught halfway between my throat
and my eyes
scream until they turn blue

nightmares of loss
embarrassment
they hold me
warm me
i am shivering
these newly blue eyes
have spread their color
to my lips
to my skin
i am cold
no matter how hard the fires
that burn where tears once flowed
try to warm me
will i let myself
feel the rush of rosy cheeks
or skipped heartbeats

i count every single one
since i don't know
when the nightmares will turn on me
and finish what you started
finally breaking it

angel in my eyes

angel in my eyes
your lies whispered in dark corners
provide me with the means to move onwards

angel in my eyes
you tell me the opposite of truth
knowing i never cared
for what reality chose to accept
because you are
the only voice i can hear
no matter how quiet you are
how loud the world yells
you're whispers in the dark corners
let me move forward
to wherever you want me to go

let me wake up in your arms,
angel in my eyes,
come over and lie to me
so i can sleep comfortably
without you
i would see harsh reality
the pain of light
hurts like birth
i escape the womb
you've entrapped me in
with rubber-gloved hands
ripping open the world
and letting in
light
sound
where are your whispers?

angel in my eyes
when open
i see a harsh world
of shapes and angels
of pain and suffering
with fits of joy
sporadic and frightening

angel in my eyes
when closed
all i see is red
where are your dark corners?
where are your whispers?

angel in my eyes
hold me in your arms
lie to me
so i can sleep
comfortably
again...

RIP Erin Leary, i hardly knew you, but i know those close to you, and you will be missed.

when tragedy strikes a friend
what is the appropriate response?
you do not know the victim
more than in passing
a chance meeting
a greeting
a smile

then when they are snatched
away from this land of the living
you realize
how important the background noise
the little details
make everything whole

and now it's just a hole

small for you
but so much bigger
so much stronger
sucking everything
everything
into noticing

background noise
never seemed
to say so much
until you cant hear
anymore.