The Talk

this is role reversal at it's finest.
with the worst timing
my dad is giving me "the talk"
now i said this is role reversal
no story of birds and bees
we've done that before
no this is with worms
life-prolonging machines

my mother has MS

she recently had to do this talk
with her mother
my family has a habit of having to do this talk early
but we're stubborn

my dad caught me off guard
started the conversation
"hey, you mind answering a couple awkward questions?"
i figure their about sex
or how i'm never home
apparently always at poetry events
the next question should not have been

"If you go active... and the worst happens. where do you want to be buried?"

i have never seen beautiful graveyard
never experienced the touch of peace
bodies laid to final rest
no
that was ruined when i heard diesel engine
diggers
lawnmowers
this is not what i consider peace
no gentle hands tilling land
no smug workers smoking waiting to fill holes
holes they know they'll occupy themselves someday

i combat his serious statement with the same joke
i've been telling people since my death-obsessed phase
my tween-hood.

"I want to be taxidermy-ed , and kept for three generations minimum."

we share a stare, knowing that was not the ansewer...
but my dad
never one to let the joke end
pops into google
trying to find out if you can

you can... oh boy you can...

human taxidermy services
they offer poses
simple everyday things
like waving
to classic art poses
like david

we laugh... more than we should
we are disturbed... there are testimonies
there is a toll free number
there is shipping information

this is for real.
my dad asks...

"well... what pose do you want"

without missing a beat of thought i respond

"they offer classic poses, gimmie Karate Kid. use my hands as coat hooks, and my knee to place a table. i dont want to be wasted space"

i never want to be wasted space
we talked about that too...
more serious...
cremate me
send me to the cemetery
let me be buried with other soldiers
if you need a headstone
give me something simple
something secondhand
with a long history
put my initials on it
sign it with love
dont leave me flowers
no need to die above me

my dad gave me the talk
like my grandmother gave my mother
this trend is not one i particularly like
when i have children
i hope they ask me the same question...

although i doubt they'll know karate kid.